I coulda been somebody…

Marlon Brando in “On the Waterfront” explaining to his brother “Charlie” (Rod Steiger) that he “shoulda looked out for him”… that he “coulda been somebody”… instead he is a bum… a nobody… the greatest fear of my natural man….

The “other voice” is a voice that constantly warns us of the danger of being a “nobody”…tells us that we need to “be somebody”… we need to do some great thing… be a winner… succeed at something… do something…. anything!… we need to be important… looked up to… accomplish great feats… serve God  (translated that means to go off to bible school to be a preacher or if you are too old for that then go off to the mission field… that was the first thing I was taught after I had given my life to the Lord)… so sad as I think about that today, 48 years later.

Oh… the years I wasted, listening to that other voice, telling me to go… to do… to build an empire for the glory of God.

There I was painting my picket fence back in 1999, having  my little pity party with God,(having tried to live up to that other voice for over 30 years that was challenging me to do great things for God)… all burned out, rejected, feeling totally useless to God or my fellow man and crying out to Him… “I don’t get it Lord.. all I ever wanted to do was to serve you and look at me now”…  He listened patiently till I finished my rantings…

Then He spoke… it was not that challenging, demanding voice… it was that gentle, loving voice that I now know so well… He spoke words that once again changed my life…

“I never asked you to do anything for me, Philip… all I ever wanted was a relationship with you.”

About philipthewolff

just ask me...
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